alone

I’m exhausted, my mind feels broken,
I feel nothing and everything at once,
Everything is shutting down,
I’m alone, and my life is draining away…

I have days where I can't wake up or function. Especially when the weather is all over the place. Well I've missed some work with FMLA protection because of the exhaustion. My wife has had it. She refuses to try and understand. It's been 15 years of this disease and I think she has finally had enough of me and it. To bad I can't walk away from the fibromyalgia too. Just lost and alone. 25 years together. Just need some advise. Some support.

Tips on when you’re not happy where you’re at in life and feel like a loser or a nobody #Depression #sad #Upset #Depression #Crying #Sadness #alone #lost #tough

I wish I had at least one more friend irl that was available to hangout with me so I wouldn’t have to be alone it is said that with #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder being alone and the fear of being alone is definitely a symptom of that disorder and that makes sense why I’m feeling the way I am right now

I went for a 4KM run, come back and had a cold shower. I noticed, albeit subtle, a sense of being on the edge of an extremely dark cloud which then I went back into. I was triggered three months ago into a high state of alertness that I haven’t come down from but I haven’t noticed the cloud so much before. It’s as if it sits over my entire head and when it does, I don’t really feel able to communicate, feel joy or pleasure. I tried keeping busy this morning which is something I don’t usually do. I cleaned the bathroom and tried getting washing going too. Had breakfast and am sitting down. But that dark cloud is over me right now. #MentalHealth #physicalsensation #Anxiety #alone #scared #PTSD #Depression

I’m hurting on many levels

I need help

I need support

The medical field has failed me

The mental health field has failed me

I feel like I’ve failed me

It’s so hard

I’m overwhelmed

Disabilities
Poverty
Suffering

I didn’t do this to myself but I’m the one still feeling punished

I'm having the weeps right now. I don't know why. I thought i was mentally prepared. I was looking forward to a break from stressfulwork and resting/recovering from (hopefully) temporary back pain. My husband will be visiting his mom tomorrow.

I'm split. I get to organize my time to my liking, writing or reading if I want to. Self care (physical therapy or rest). Music for me.

But I'm feeling alone and frghtened and old. (64, feel likee 84, but doubt I will reach 70--I hope not.)

Rambling, and mucking up this post in this app. I'll write to myself and call a warm in the morning after m husband leaves