Therapy is exhausing.
I'm now in week three of actually doing exposures for my ERP therapy. The first couple weeks we focused on less serious obsessions about rust, but yesterday we dove into something much more bothersome: my violent intrusive images. The gross scary picture I had to look at has come into my mind a few times already, and I am doing my best to lean into the uncertainty, I really am. But I don't know if I have the strength to do it by myself without getting swallowed up by the fear and despair. Even when I haven't been thinking about it, I have just felt so exhausted all day today and yesterday. I'm randomly crying and I can't focus very well. I know that it has to suck before it helps, but I don't know how to tell if this is productive distress tolerance or unproductive wallowing in bad feelings. Anyone else who is doing or has done ERP, how do you tell if you're properly leaning into uncertainty and tolerating the associated pain, and when you've taken on an exposure that is too much at the moment and is just overwhelming you with pain? #OCD #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #ERP #exposureresponseprevention #Therapy #IntrusiveThoughts #Dissociation