mom guilt

Just because someone is smiling doesn't mean they're FINE .Just because someone you see that is unwell or has been dealing with any physical or mental health issues is smiling doesn't meant they're BETTER .It doesn't mean they're OK now or that they're not in pain .Usually alot of the time it's because they are used to dealing with their struggles and pain and are just trying to put on a smile and get on with it .You never know how much someone is really struggling so don't judge them .Don't just assume or make comments to them about their health being better or because they don't look sick if they're smiling or have managed to get dressed or go out .You've no idea how much it's taken them to even do that ....
And you never know just how much someone need syour kindness today ♥️

BE KIND ♡
YOU MATTER ♡
LOVE YOURSELF ♡

#MentalHealth #MentalHealthAwareness #mentalhealthmatters #Anxiety #Depression #Selfcare #Melanoma #SkinCancer #Insomnia #longcovid #COVID19 #PTSD #Upallnight #CheckInWithMe #Bekind #loveyourself #GeneralParenting #Parenting #MomGuilt #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #BladderPain #BladderProblems #bladder #Endometriosis #AloneTogether

So tomorrow is the little ones last day at school before the 7/8 weeks summer break.
I had been hoping g that I'd have had some sort of surgery or treatment by now before this instead doff just being left like this for nearly 4 months now.I am feeling so anxious about trying to be mummy everyday over the break ,making it fun for them ,keeping them occupied and busy and making memories while mostly being housebound.If it's nice we can spend time in the garden and do things ther ebut even that I know I will struggle with ,so on the rubbish weather days when we're estuck at home while I'm in constant pain I am stressing about how I can make it fun for them ,be mummy , not ruin their break because I am in agony and supposed to be on bed rest !! I feel frustrated that I have been left like this and still waiting on appointments regarding teats and if can get the surgery etc. I go in next Wednesday for biopsies ,two for cysts they found on my thyroids so I'll have stitches and stuff too and probably not be feeling the greatest. So my anxiety is just so bad ,feeling so guilty that compare dto last year I can't do the things I always did with them plan trips,days away, swimming,fun activities etc as even doing simple things at home are such a struggle pain wise and then totally drain me ......
Really trying to think of lots of little ideas to do with them to make memories and make it as fun as I can for them but I am really stressing over it .
While also trying to make sure i have little moments of self care for myself to help with my anxiety & to try take those moments to do things for me to just recharge myself so i dont end up completely burntout.Having chronic pain ontop of other health issues while trying to be the old me and best mummy I can now is definitely challenging 😭😭😭

#MentalHealth #mentalhealthmatters #Anxiety #Depression #Selfcare #Melanoma #SkinCancer #Insomnia #longcovid #COVID19 #PTSD #Upallnight #CheckInWithMe #Bekind #loveyourself #GeneralParenting #Parenting #MomGuilt #Positivity

The postpartum period after delivering a baby is a little over a year, yet we are told often we are supposed to ‘bouncing back’ to normal after 3 months.

The old ways of viewing postpartum causes stress to new moms, with 15% - 20% experiencing debilitating symptoms.

Postpartum stress syndrome is a step below postpartum depression and postpartum anxiety in terms of severity.

“While postpartum stress syndrome can create feelings of anxiety that are unsettling, these feelings do not impede her ability to function or get through the day,”

Yet, the rise of postpartum stress and depression is on the rise, especially since the beginning of the pandemic in 2020.

What is going on, and what can we do about it ?

First, we were doing too much before the pandemic, at least many were. Mothers and caregivers especially felt the stress post COVID 19 with working jobs and then managing childcare or school in the home.

Second, we are adding to the increasing challenges by maintaining the old ways of life and trying to ‘return to normal.” Except, our world isn’t like it was. Women are expected to work as though they don’t have kids, raise children as if they don’t work, and live in a way that resembles a child-free life.

Instead I ask you to honor where you are in your life, especially if you have younger kids under the age of 5. Cut yourself a lot of slack and know this reality isn’t forever.

If you want to “challenge” yourself, ask yourself how you can enjoy moments to yourself, manage your stress, and be present with what is. There are many techniques to help you in 10 minutes or less.

The more we all push back as moms and caretakers, the sooner we can all move towards a new way of being; one where we feel more balanced and not torn in multiple directions.

#postpartum #PostpartumAnxiety #newmom #AutoimmuneDisease #LymeDisease #Stress #Anxiety #PostpartumDepression #mom #MomGuilt #AdrenalFatigue #AddisonsDisease #Pregnancy

Nobody warns you the fear and worry that motherhood brings. My child is delayed physically which means a lot of different things to a lot of different people and well I’m still figuring out what that means for me. I’m still processing, worrying, and trying to not think of the worst possible outcome, but it’s hard to not go there. I’m emotionally and physically exhausted. Having someone ask me after telling me she is developing months behind, what goals do you have for your child? Ah to walk/develop on time, to thrive, to not struggle, to live a happy independent life. Or what do you hope for your child, are you kidding me? What kind of questions are these? And then when I respond with walking in the next 6 months, they look surprised and like that was a stupid answer. What did they expect me to say? Does this mean they don’t think that’s possible? What does being delayed this much really mean? The whys and the what’s, the not knowing. That’s one of the hardest parts Is not having the answers. Not knowing. Being clueless and hell I have a masters degree, little good that helps me with this. They don’t prepare you for the sadness that comes from not knowing, from worrying. They don’t prepare you for how you have to traumatize your child by physically holding them down on a table to get one blood test only to have it fail (aka they couldn’t find her vein but kept poking anyways) and have to go to another doctor to get another blood test done with an ultrasound (which is what they should’ve suggested in the first place). For then it to come back abnormal and make you wait 72 hours to find out why or what that means because they haven’t had time to look at it, well then why give me the notification of an abnormal test, is it just to make me sit here and worry? Ugh mothers worry enough as it is and then to have more thrown at you. Do medical processes for children even involve a parents perspective who’s been there before? The social worker in me is furious how not trauma informed medical care is especially for children. For gods sake when we had to go to the ER for a scary allergic reaction we got put in the isolation room for those at risk for harming themselves, no wonder my daughter associates negative emotions when seeing medical providers, we were in a cold room with nothing around while they poked her with needles, didn’t even try to make it silly or less scary, just poked her. Direct (don’t totally hate that with myself, but with a baby, come on). She literally cried every single time a person in scrubs came into the room. She’s only a baby, but she knows. Gosh it even triggered me. The social worker in me is pissed, the mom in me is scared, worried, and sad. #MomGuilt #delayed #Trauma #Anxiety #sad #Motherhood #MedicalTrauma