threats

When I was a child, I've always had troubles falling asleep. Because my mind was fully awake, when very young, but then mostly because of stuff I was deadly afraid of. When I managed to, I had very vivid nightmares and used to wake up a lot during the night, having troubles falling asleep again.

Each time I got in bed, I started trying not to fall asleep, because bad things would have occured if I wasn't there awake and aware, in order to acknowledge anything that was happening in the house.

I now fall asleep more easily, but I remember having only one nice dream; each night I have at least one nightmare, usually up to many more.

The nightmares are generally about threats or issues I should escape safe from or disturbing stuff in general. They're very long and articulated, implying plots and including a lot of details.

When I wake up, if my attention isn't suddenly drawn to something else, the dreams usually follow me during the day and it takes a big part of it for them and their effects to vanish away.

If there's anyone interested in sharing some thoughts about this, I'd be happy to.

It can be very stressful and I haven't slept well in ages. I'd like to find a key to understand this or simply tips to try and see if they could help me.

Anyone who can relate?

#Nightmares #SleepDeprivation #Sleep #sleeppattern #sleepissue #Insomnia #Paranoia #threats #dreams #fallingasleep #thirst #Stress #overthinking #worstcasescenarios #Fear #sleepdisorder #OCD #Anxiety #Obsession #Death #obsessivethoughts

As a young kid I was always exposed to toxic people and mental illness. It always came out in the most traumatic of ways. My mother, the person meant to care, nurture, and protect me and my siblings.. she would threaten and even attempted to drive into oncoming buses, 18 wheelers, and so much more. She’d use suicide as a way to get us to listen or behave. She always threatened to slit her wrists or her throat and let us watch as she bled out as a way to get us to “respect” her. People wonder why me and two of my siblings are so screwed up. Its because of the way we were raised. I wonder how we aren’t worse than we are. The younger one of us is the lucky one. We always did our best to shield all of the mess and drama from her. I now have a son and have no idea how you can do those things or even threaten them in front of a child. Even in my darkest of days I would never in a million years even think to threaten him like that. #Suicide #threats #Toxicmom #ChildhoodAbuse