depression#mentalhealthawareness

This week has been heavy. When I got home from work today, I realized how exhausted and sad I was feeling. I just wanted to crawl into a hole and not do anything. I didn't want to think, I didn't want to feel, I just wanted to sleep -- except sleep hasn't been an escape lately either, thanks to nightmares. Last night I had constant nightmares, all different topics... as soon as I would wake up in a panic from one, then soothe myself and fall back asleep, another would hit.

So today... today. What do I do to manage these feelings? Well, for one, I honor them. I don't push them away. I don't scorn them, I don't let myself slide into self-hatred for feeling like this. I accept them for what they are. The world is a heavy place right now. It feels dark and hopeless with news of mass shootings and new COVID variants and the ongoing war against women's rights and LGBTQIA+ rights... on and on and on.

I read. I got some fresh air. I spent some time with my hands in the dirt, working with my plants. And I write. I write. Writing is my lifeline. It always has been. As an angsty teen, my journaling both made my depression worse and also helped me survive. Now, as an adult, and one who is striving for healthier coping skills, I am writing here. I am also working on writing my own novel. I have my own journal on a Word doc that is just for my own eyes, a journal where I try to steer away from rumination but still try to write about my day.

I keep on going. Because what other choice is there?

#depression#mentalhealthawareness #CPTSD #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder

I felt abandoned, despondent, very low, and desperately lonely.

Yes, I know depression well. She is a dear old friend.

After developing a mental illness when I got pregnant at age 23, I lost my CDL driver’s license and professional career as a commercial truck driver, afterwards, subsequent divorce, and lost custody of my only child. I lived alone for over 10 years. For many of those years, I wasn’t even allowed have a cat because of tenancy rules.

I’ve learned how to deal with her successfully, and am usually now a pretty happy person. When I feel down, I know it’s not permanent, and I’ll be okay. I follow certain strategies to get myself back on track.

I’m here to share my strategies for finding joy in everyday life. Getting out of bed is a choice I make daily.

Peace and hopefulness are such better places in which to abide.

growthpaths.net/coping-skills-for-depression-and-loneliness

Do you have any additional tips for feeling better? Please share in the comments. Thanks!

#MentalHealth #depression#mentalhealthawareness #DepressionSymptoms #Depression #MentalHealthAwareness #MentalHealthAwarenessMonth #lonelytogether #Recovery #CopingTips

A few days ago I convinced myself I wasn’t sad

Just tired

Like The Little Prince I lied

Over and over

“You’re just tired”

“You’re just tired”

Without knowing that the sadness wouldn’t be fooled by a fool

Like me

#yourenotalone #depression#mentalhealthawareness   #tiredoffighting #tiredoffeelingsad #sad #Cantstopcrying  

Just wanted to share a poem I wrote. Journaling has been very helpful with my mental health.

Title: Trapped
Stuck in bad habits,
Racing thoughts haunting me,
I sit back while predators prey on me
while I struggle to find a sense of worth.
But how do I change a mind that has already been molded into unhealthy and toxic behaviors?
So set in my ways,
Will I ever be able to love myself the way I love others?
Or will I forever be trapped and consumed by my thoughts?
Will I be able to set my emotion mind aside and think more logical?
Can I climb out of this deep hole I am in,
or will I forever be trapped?

#Trapped #Poetry #depression#mentalhealthawareness