Nurse

Hi everyone! Thank you for accepting me.

I am a licensed #counselor in New York State.

I have been in #Therapy since I was 16. I’ll be 41 this year.

As a #mentalhealthprofessional , I have found that one way to #endstigma is to be more #authentic and #Vulnerable .

What does that mean? Well… therapists needs therapists, too! #Burnout is real. I know I especially do a horrible job with #selfcare . The last two years have been especially hard on almost everyone, and the need for more funding for MH in our country is not where we want it to be. :(

I have #generalizedanxiety and #MajorDepressiveDisorder . I had horrible #postpartum anxiety and depression for a year after my son was born.

I invite anyone in the helping professions to join our group. Let’s support one another and lift each other up. Thank you. :)
#socialwork #Counseling #Psychiatrist #psychologist #Nurse #Therapist #endstigma #Support

They do say, patients are experts by experience. I also have a first class honours in Mental Health, what level of expertise is that?

Imagine the internal conflict, the sole purpose of my job is to teach people skills to help them manage their own internal conflict. But, you practise what you preach and it doesn’t work? Insight is such a thickle concept, I’m trained to assess a persons capacity, but fail to see when my own is diminished.

Apparently, according to research those diagnosed with bipolar tend to be ‘intelligent and creative.’ So do I have grandiose beliefs or are the articles lying?

I started writing this when I was depressed. I’ve since experienced both mixed and manic episodes. I have found the diagnostic process extremely destabilising. I’ve had several flashbacks, ‘light bulb’ moments. Those traumatic events I buried and thought were ‘poor’ life choices, were in fact textbook episodes of mania.

I’m tired of this rollercoaster, the mania no longer feels like an aspirational state. I seem to find myself in an even bigger hole each time depression hits, I’m not too sure what to do, or where to turn to.

Photo credit @flexibleartsofficial

#Bipolar #Mania #Depression #Nurse #MentalHealth #CPN #CMHT

There’s a picture of me six years ago. I was looking through my husbands phone for some thing and this picture popped up.
I was working home hospice and loving it! I was starting to become pretty good at my job and I had gotten a raise! I was feeling pretty good about myself. I was exactly who I wanted to be, and even then I knew that was some thing that most people could not say.
Most people go to jobs that they tolerate, but being a RN is something that I really had to work hard for and I love. I have worked in the field in one aspect or another for almost 20 years.
I had to quit my travel nurse gig 13 months ago. As well as my PRN hospital job. The symptoms we’re making me unsafe as a caregiver. No one wants a confused nurse.
The last few moths, I have started to get my symptoms under control and get in a routine to where I can function at home with my 4 children! And this is amazing. And I am happy. However I am nowhere near able to go back to work. Because I can sit up and fold laundry does not mean that I can be on my feet for 12 hours. But I want to be so badly.
I miss the confidence and security of knowing who I was and that I was good at my job. Good enough to travel! Good enough to be able to walk on to any MedSurg floor and handle it. I miss being myself. I hope someday to be able to see that woman again.
I think trying to figure out who I am now almost harder than dealing with the symptoms. Because I knew who I was , and who I wanted to me and I knew I was capable of achieving it ! And I have worked so hard towards achieving it. And now it’s all water under the bridge.