I have struggled with three very specific, repetitive, intrusive thoughts since 2017 (yes, that was a bad year and my depression hit an all-time low), and the intensity of the thoughts has increased or stayed consistent since. On an average day, I have between 120-180 thoughts (just these three, not counting other thoughts)
The thoughts are (for the most part) the exact same wording every time, and self-harming in nature. I say they’re intrusive because they are unwanted and I feel like I have no control over them - they happen both triggered and seemingly untriggered. But at the same time, they don’t seem to fit in to any type of category. I have other “typical” intrusive thoughts about myself, depressive thoughts, etc, but these “sound” different. They have a different tone to them.
I have talked about them with different therapists, but I always feel like they don’t quite get it. My current therapist has suggested talking to my doctor about medication to help with the frequency (I do already take medication for depression). Can anyone relate? #IntrusiveThoughts #MajorDepressiveDisorder