overstimulated

For my mental health sake, I sincerely ask if you could please censor c*v*d-19 (o, i) or the other words, p*nd*mic (a, e), and q**rantine (ua) or leave them out entirely before posting any comments. Thank you, you’re the best!
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Before I say anything, I just want everybody to know that I am not intending to be/sound rude when I say any of this.

Saying that “well, *trigger word* is not going to go away” or “it is what it is” are the least helpful things you can say to someone with triggers, because to me, it feels like you’re saying “welp, you’re screwed for the rest of your life” and for the latter “I simply don’t care”, even if you’re not intending to sound that way.

Yes, I still have these words as my triggers everyday. It still brings me flashbacks whenever I fucking hear any of the words and how much of a sad life I’m still in (and I already have mostly negative views about society) because I unintentionally drag myself into that very sad period of 2020 and beyond.

I’m trying to work this over with my therapist, but I haven’t because there’s a thousand things that happen with me and are on my fucking mind everyday, and if not everyday, then most days (traumatic flashbacks, being overstimulated by youngest nephew constantly, stress dreams, trying to make time for all 7 of my queerplatonic partners (yes, it’s healthy, non-romantic, and consensual) and trying to be perfect around them all the time (I should probably stop doing that), waiting to move out of here already into a more safer and quieter environment, extreme social dysphoria as a non-binary individual, etc. etc.)

#MyAutismIsNotADisorder #SocialAnxiety #Trauma #Anxiety #triggers #normalizetriggerwarnings #overstimulated #overwhelmed #triggerwarning #venting #LGBTQIA #MentalHealth

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I’m scared to share this in fear to be seen as rude or toxic.. I swear I’m not, but I always regret yelling “shut up!” whenever I hear conflict and when I’m already very overstimulated. I hate yelling, and I don’t want to yell at others. I hate it. But whenever I do it, it’s never towards specific individuals, just the situation in general. I try my hardest not to yell out loud, but sometimes no matter what I do, it slips and yell “just shut up!” with tears strolling down my face.

I’m very scared that this is going to come off as me being toxic, rude, ignorant, or whatever other negative term. I don’t want to be seen that way, and I don’t want it to make it seems like I’m yelling at others, because I — hate — that so much and I feel like a terrible individual and that I deserve pa1n (i).

Also I’m otherkin, so I kindly ask to please not refer to me as human /genrq

#MyAutismIsNotADisorder #Anxiety #overstimulated #SocialAnxiety #Conflict

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I bet the nephews are home today (again 😞) because of President’s Day. I can’t even get some dang peace and quiet in this dang house, not even a full week anymore, so I’m leaving out this dang house (again. Seriously, I just wanted to relax today 😞😞).

And what’s so good about the damn day anyway? I mean I get that they run everything and all, and Biden’s better in other ways than our last horrible good-for-nothing president, but he refuses to defund the police even though he believes in Black Lives Matter, he’s pro-Israel, I’ve heard he once thought to make homelessness illegal, etc.

Also, our government just plain sucks, they can’t see that non-binary identities exist (until like 2025), 1000% of the time I always get misgendered by higher authority (which pains me a lot inside), I got taken off of social security because they seriously thought that I can work no problem (which, I’ve said plenty of times, I cannot for a vast multitude of reasons) and had to face my autism being called a disability throughout the entire time (which I despise), the list can go on and on. This is the entire reason I’m an anarchist, can’t we just depend on ourselves for our rights instead of the government who barely even knows you? /rh

#Autism #Anxiety #Family #unfair #President #nonbinary #sad #overstimulated

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This is starting to get on my nerves.

Can’t I just have a full week of quiet when my nephews are at school? Like how it’s - supposed - to be?? My youngest nephew had a fever and had to stay home for three days, so it doesn’t count, I’m disregarding that (please nobody mention the other virus name, it’s a trigger to me). But why are they always home on a Friday now??

But if next week doesn’t happen, I’m going to go crazy. I just wanted a - full - week of more quiet time, Monday to Friday. And it hasn’t happened since the middle of last month, and it freaking irritates me. And no, there’s absolutely nothing my sister can do about it. I just have to wish to move out of here faster. This is freaking bothering me. Why does this have to happen????

I’m so sick of listening to that same YouTuber in the living room background who I don’t even fucking like (because they said the r slur twice one time, and yes I know that you can still enjoy the content without supporting the creator or their actions/beliefs, it exists. That’s my oldest nephew’s situation. But ugh, I couldn’t even do that).

I just want to walk out of my room without worrying to put on headphones every single time. Can’t that just happen more often?!

#Autism #Anxiety #sad #Family #School #ijustwantedsomequiettime #fml #overstimulated

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My nephews have been home since last Wednesday, and today is Sunday morning for me, and I’m this close to having a headache just from them being here.

I wish I couldn’t get overstimulated from this. I feel bad for it.

But I swear, I’m leaving out this house tomorrow to go somewhere else if they stay home another day, I can’t take this. I think I’m just going to start doing that for now on because I can’t.

I really hope to move out before their summer break 🙏

#Autism #Anxiety #overstimulated #Family

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Why? Why did my nephews had to be home today?? Just why?? I swear I love them, but my autism - says - why??

Now I’m planning to just leave out for today. I’m so sick of this shit. I’m so sick of being overstimulated like this.

And why does it always have to be on the same day as my therapist appointment? It’s not like I can reschedule because then we would have to pay $100 just for fucking rescheduling this late.

Screw it, I’m still leaving early and having the online appointment elsewhere. I don’t care how cold it is or whatever, I’m going.

What a shit first day of the month. First it’s me being triggered and crying last night because of accidentally reading transgender violence statistics and was scared for my life because I’m trans nonbinary, now it’s my nephews being home. 😑😤

#anger #Autism #why #ihatethis #overstimulated #Anxiety

We both have a series of chronic illnesses each. He is mourning over his, but seems stuck in anger and 'nothing can ever make this better'. I tend to lecture him about how our mindset is part of the problem, not the problem itself, but contributing to it, and that we can change our mindset for a better life. Go positive thinking! Yea, but it is not what he needs in his depression. How can I support him better? I wish there was something I could do for him. He does have a good counsellor, thankfully. Any thoughts? #ChronicPain #overstimulated #Fatigue #Partners